Not feeling yourself after having a baby? You are not alone.

Becoming a mother is the most joyous transformation I have experienced, but it was also the most stressful. The loneliest. The saddest. These are things a lot of mothers experience almost immediately after having their baby, and understanding why is an important step in being able to openly discuss our experiences.

In the hours, and weeks after labor and delivery hormone levels fluctuate widely. Anytime there are hormone fluctuations in our bodies they will likely be accompanied by mood swings, hence the “baby blues.” Estrogen and progesterone levels drop very quickly after delivery. Both of these hormones contribute to various functions within the body, but I will be addressing their role in cognitive health and mood. Estrogen assists with memory and fine motor skills, hence “mom brain.” Low estrogen can cause depression, anxiety, and sadness through its influence on the production and activity of serotonin (a mood regulating neurotransmitter). In most cases immediately after birth, our bodies release prolactin and oxytocin to compensate for low progesterone and estrogen. This explains the feeling of euphoria experienced by mothers when laying eyes on their earthbound little ones for the first time, and meeting my baby was nothing less than euphoric. These hormone releases could be delayed so having a different experience is okay and not a sign that you love your baby any less. The impact does not stop there, endorphins rise throughout labor, reach a peak immediately after labor, and steadily decline postpartum. Endorphins play a few roles in our bodies, but most relevant to mental health they are responsible for feelings of happiness and stress reduction.

While we cannot fully credit the “baby blues” to hormone changes they do play a big role in the after effects of giving birth. Other suspected causes, or contributing factors, can be a traumatizing labor and delivery, sleep deprivation, feeding issues, and relationship struggles. Within an hour of giving birth a nurse helped my baby latch to my breast to nurse, and it was easy as pie. It was like he knew exactly what to do. Our nurse looked surprised and muttered the warning, “it won’t always be this easy” and she was right. Soon after we got home latching became difficult for me and my son.

The “baby blues” can last a few weeks after having a baby and symptoms include:

• Sadness
• Mood Swings
• Insomnia
• Anxiety
• And in my case, excessive crying

These are just a few of the symptoms and they can create other problems. Insomnia brings on lack of sleep brings on fatigue brings on irritability and so on and so forth.

Approximately 70% of women experience the “baby blues” postpartum and it does not look the same for everyone. In my experience, I felt empty. The little human I carried with me everywhere for 9 months was no longer in my belly, but just a foot away from me in his bassinet. When I laid him down I, more often then I would like to admit, went into my closet and closed the door. I cried for hours. Most of the time I did not even understand why. It was confusing, I had just welcomed the biggest joy into my life and yet I experienced sadness at an intensity I never had before. The CW’s teen drama “The Vampire Diaries” describes transitioning into a vampire as a heightening of emotions. Happiness, sadness, hunger, anger are all felt at an unprecedented intensity, and that my friends is what becoming a mother felt like. The highs were unbelievably high, and the lows were unbelievably low.

Oftentimes, mothers have a tendency to care for everyone else around them and neglect their own needs. I think in part due to the fact that our bodies change so much throughout pregnancy and postpartum that we do not know how to care for ourselves. My usual go to when feeling overwhelmed and run down was a hot bath. The World Health Organization recommends waiting at least 24 hours post-delivery, and depending on tearing you may need to wait a few weeks which was my case. I will delve into postpartum self-care as the weeks go on, but the most important self-care for your mental health is not pretty. It is making time for the most basic self-care that in a previous life pre-motherhood was a given, but is easily forgotten. Take a shower. Brush your teeth. Drink a lot of water. The standard for self-care in the first few weeks can be extremely low as you adjust to a whole new life. Create a “must do” list of self-care rituals you absolutely cannot go without. It should be short and attainable, but long enough to feel human. As your mind and body heal this “must do” list can start to look closer and closer to your pre-baby self-care. While the last thing I was worried about 1 week postpartum was my skincare routine, I happily re-included it in my mornings when I was able to. I have listed a few recommendations to get through the “baby blues” below.

• “Breathe Mama Breathe” by Shonda Moralis -this book is all about finding your calm in the storm.
• Check-in’s -confide in those you love about the highs and the lows.
• Ask for help -be specific about your needs to those around you.
• Balanced diet -fish oil supplementation is highly recommended for cognitive health for you and baby.
• Remember that the “baby blues” are common, normal, and temporary!

The “baby blues” last 1-2 weeks after delivery. If your symptoms persist this may be a sign of Postpartum Depression (PPD). PPD is common and there are resources available to help.

Lidicker, G. (2020, December 8). Postpartum Hormone Changes Happen, But Here’s How to Rebalance Them Properly. Parsley Health Articles. Retrieved October 6, 2023, from https://www.parsleyhealth.com/blog/postpartum-hormones/#SnippetTab

Geddes, J. K. (2023, April 6). The Baby Blues. What To Expect. Retrieved October 6, 2023, from https://www.whattoexpect.com/first-year/postpartum-health-and-care/baby-blues